Saturday, 21 August 2010

My Hijab!

I was reverted to Islam a year ago and since then I could never imagine myself going out without my Hijab. Before Islam I was one of the women who questioned inside my mind how someone could wear a full body cover on this hot country as I am here in Dubai. One of my friends who earlier reverted to Islam wears... Abaya and a hair cover and I still remember how I used to ask her to take off her cover but she never did.Then I became a Muslim. All my friends where shock when they saw me wearing Hijab. They thought that I was just playing with them and they cannot believe that a very philosophically inclined individual as me would accept Islam and all its teachings when they knew that I never even pray and went with them to church for a very long time. And my ordeal started to begin. When my Christian friends learned that I became a Muslim, hatred started to build a space between us. I heard a lot of bad stories against me, that I was paid with a huge amount of money just to accept Islam and more. There is even a story that I will never be able to stand the pressure and they were so sure that I will go out one day without my Hijab. On the first day after my Shahada, I was so ashamed to go out with my head cover. So I went to work that day wearing a loose uniform with a long sleeve but without a hair cover. But when my Muslim colleagues who heard the news of my reversion start greeting me, I feel so ashamed not because they saw me without Hijab but because I know that deep in my heart I should have wear the head cover. So I hide myself and when I came out I was in a head cover and all of them (Muslims) were very happy as they welcome me to Islam. But the fight of Hijab issue with my Christian friends started to become worst. Once there was a colleague of mine who pulled my head cover to shame me in the public. They laugh and mocked at me when they saw me and tell me that I have a very nice skin and nice long hair but why should I cover? Am I not proud of having it? I just did not mind them but deep inside I was fighting it. Every time I got home I will cry. Every time I prayed I cried not because I regret becoming a Muslim but because I don’t know until when I can hold my temper. I ask God to give me more patience for I do not want to create any trouble especially now that Islam had taught me how patience saves my days of sufferings. I was isolated from my colleagues other than Muslim brothers and sisters. They ignore me as if I did not exist and even, I can hear them laughing behind me in the elevator, in hall way of our building, even in the staff canteen. Then one day I ask them why they are not talking to me like before. And they told me, they will talk to me again and befriended with me again if I will take off my Hijab. There was a sudden force in my heart that pushes my tongue to said to them that even if the whole world won’t be talking with me as long as I know that I am obeying the commandments of my Lord, I will never take off my Hijab. And I said to them that they may never understand my decision in accepting Islam and wearing Hijab but they have to respect it. And I assure them inshallah they can never see me without my Hijab ever again. From then on there was a dramatic silence of their mocking and laughing on my Hijab until I got married with a very good Muslim man. I wanted to wear Niqab and my husband permitted me to wear it when I am not on duty as we are working in the ambulance as Paramedics. But people start questioning again even the Muslims why. They thought my husband was forcing me to wear Niqab even if I told them it is my choice to become a Niqabi because I feel more comfortable wearing it. Every time people will ask me why I made myself oppressed? But they don’t know that deep in my heart I am so happy becoming a Muslim, serving my husband to the best that I can, wearing my Hijab and Niqab, and accepting all the teachings of the Holy Qur-an. Islam made me a very contented and happy person. Allah (subhana wa taala) gave me a man who guided me through, facing the trials and tribulations of the world when I accepted Islam.For my brothers and sisters in Islam, I believe that being a Muslimah is not just saying the Testimony of Faith but also obeying what “Allah” The Almighty had ordered us to do, and one of it is Hijab. Since I became a Muslim I could never imagine myself going out without my Hijab. Subhanallah I feel so proud, protected and comfortable on my Hijab and Niqab. We must not take the rule of Hijab lightly for if we did, we are neglecting the commandments of Allah (swt). And Allah knows best.

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